Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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