I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
