worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
