her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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