I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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