i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize