i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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