I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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