I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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