I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
