I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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