i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
