i'm signing you up for texting rehab
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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