No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
