my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
