I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
