I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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