I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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