What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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