if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
At least make sure they are 18
Why
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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