we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
