That's when you crack a 10am beer
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
