D3 body, D1 cock
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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