this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I touched a dick in church today
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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