I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
