Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
