did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
