"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
