Your tits are I can't wait for
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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