please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
