There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
