Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
