my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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