why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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