thus making me awesome and them whores
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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