drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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