told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
