i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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