He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
