I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
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