We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
