I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
