every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
