Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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