i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize