How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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