No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
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