just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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