So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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