She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
