Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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