I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
